Friday, January 9, 2009

The Dastardly Deeds of Perfesser Mortyarty

In which Morty, the pug, acts out his displeasure at spending time Home Alone now that both of his humans have jobs.

Episode I: "I Can Haz Choklats?" LOL Pug (AKA Count Chocupug) will find the last holiday chocolates and eat them all, even if they're closed in a box and under a pile of stuff! Your puny ipecacs will have no effect on his cast iron stomach, and will only make him thirsty. Very, very thirsty.

Episode II: "Barky Barkerson's All Night Barkathon." People talking in the street? BARK! Neighbors coming home late? BARK BARK!! Invisible, silent-but-deadly terrorists lurking outside at 3AM? BARK BARK BARKITY BARK!!!!!!!!

Episode III: "What's In This Bag?" If Mr. Pottymouth finds himself barred from using the cat's litter box as his own personal snack tray, scattering fresh kitty litter all over the floor is his idea of poetic justice!

Episode IV: "What's In This Bag, Redux." There might be an IED in the recycling - you can't be sure until it's been knocked over and its contents examined thoroughly! Your loyal dog risks his life for you, even when you're not home!

Episode V: "Barky Barkerson's All Night Barkathon, Part II - Electric Boogaloo!" Join Barky for another Bark-O-Rama, with special guest stars Sir Whinesalot and the Growlinator!

Stay Tuned - more exciting episodes are, no doubt, coming your way!


Shelly said...

You could call him Barky Von Barksalot. Or maybe Obarkma.

Justine said...

I've just remembered that I've neglected to stop by here for a while. Good to hear that you are settled and happy, and I won't even tell you the temperature here in Indiana except to say that our pipes froze last week and I had to pour half a container of table salt into the bathtub to shower. Hello to Brian and the furries!

Justine said...

P.S. Yankee got a home. I don't know if that's been mentioned, but apparently he's a spoiled rotten lucky in his old age - finally.

Stephanie said...

I like Barky Von Barksalot, though I might tweak and call him Barky Von Barkmeister. There's also the Barkinator, the Barkatollah, and the Woofmaster.

Yay for Yankee! He was at HELP The Animals for a long time and I hope he finishes out his golden years with lots of love and comfort.

Shelly said...


Peteena said...

Barky Bark. Barky the Kid. Generalissimo Francisco Barko. Bark Simpson. We enjoy this game!

Anonymous said...

Hey! Hey Hey Hey Hey Hey!!!
Hey Hey Hey!!!

adriennefriend said...

Found your blog through Anna Lisa's... OH MY GOD, this is the funniest thing I've read it a WHILE. It's especially charming because I knew Mordecai, of course... but wow. I had my BF Nathaniel read it to me and he did the best prime-time commercial announcer voice ever.

Thanks for the laughs,
Miss all three of ya,
Adrienne N Lowe

Stephanie said...

Hi, Adrienne! You still know Mordecai, you just don't see him anymore! He would love to lick you leg if you were here.

BrianY said...

We had an encore of Episode III tonight. Partly my fault, as I left him alone from about 1:45 to about 10:15 PM, but I mean really... does he truly think that the gritty powdery stuff that proved to be inedible last time would have somehow have been transformed into a savory snack? Aaaaargh.